I heard the voice of the sovereign master say, “Whom will I send? Who will go on our behalf?” I answered, “Here I am, send me!”
Isa 6:8 (NET)
Answering the call of the lord is not easy. It is an uncomfortable journey. I can attest to that. As I write this my ears are popping from the increasing altitude. I look out of the passenger window and all I see are clouds and what seems to be civilization down below. I see clouds peppered onto what looks like a sea of brown and green. I hear the roar of the engines through my headphones. I turn the music up, but quickly realize that the hum serves as a reassurance for me. Yet, thoughts flood my mind. Thoughts of my family back home; thoughts of my mommy and daddy who stayed behind in San Antonio. Why is this so uncomfortable? Well, this is the first time I travel so far from home. This is also the first time I fly. Not me literally, but travel by plane. Yeah I cried as we took off, but those were tears of joy. Tears from the knowledge that God picked me to go on this mission trip. I hold back some tears for the fear of others thinking something is wrong. Nothing wrong; I am happy and filled with joy. I’m awe struck. Then, I start to think of Isaiah. “Here I am,” he said. “Send me!” I remember when God asked me that question and I stood silent. Then my lord took a more direct approach and called me out directly. I took more of a Jonah approach, but the lord would not let up. He would whisper in my ear. “I pick you,” he would softly say. I felt so unworthy. God knew I felt that I was far from ready to leave on this trip and farther from feeling worthy enough to go. Yet, like Isaiah, the lord cleansed me and prepared me to go. He asked again, “Who will go?” I answered, “Here I am, send me.”
This post was written 7/23/2013 shortly after takeoff
